Guidelines for Coffee Production

I’m rather annoyed at the lack of coffee production in my office. image I drink two or three (okay, three, sometime four) cups daily.  Almost every time I refill my mug, I find that all three of our coffee pots are nearly empty and no refill is in the works.  Let’s be honest, people.  Coffee is essential.  That’s why I drink it.  That’s why you drink it.  That’s why the pot I made 20 or 30 minutes ago is empty already.  We all appreciate how it transforms us.


However, this lack of coffee production is really quite disturbing.  If I’m not making the pot so I can get another cup, I typically see the same two other people making it.  I frequently see the same handful of people walking away with a cup and leaving empty pots behind them.

In order to solve the problem, I’d like to propose the following guidelines as a standard for most offices, with the ability to justify as needed.  (This, like National Hug Day guidelines, will join the Word Nerd Chronicles.)

  • If you drink coffee, make coffee.
  • If you don’t know how to make coffee at your office, find out.
  • If no one knows how to make coffee, this is a sad place to work and warn new hires, please.
  • Coffee should be made regularly between the time the office opens and lunch-ish.
  • Determine if your office needs post lunch coffee.  (Mine does, but a pot of decaf and a pot of regular seems to cover the needs.)
  • Coffee making duties are not gender specific.  Men and women alike can make coffee.
  • Non-coffee drinkers – please refrain from making coffee.  Coffee drinkers everywhere thank you.

What guidelines do you want for your office?



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