A Better Question

Dear Everyone,

This is a gentle PSA: When you know someone (me, or others) who is involved in wedding planning, it’s ok to not ask us how the planning is going.

There are lots of other things still happening in the world, too. Things we care about, like new books coming out, or fall TV shows or the 2016 presidential campaign.

The problem is, you’re the eleventy-first person to ask, “How’s the bridezillaplanning going?” And that’s swell, because you’re a friend and it is nice to know you care. But then I’m stuck. Do I just say, “Fine,” (which actually is the truth?) or do I launch into the litany again for what we’ve done and what still needs doing? The truth is that question makes me feel lizardly inside, just a bit.

Maybe the better question is, “Hey, Bethany, would you like to talk about the planning, or would you rather spend our time together talking <INSERT GREAT TOPIC IDEA HERE>?” We could talk about anything else. Whether Endeavour Morse or Sherlock Holmes is the better, broody detective. The price of tea in China. Things happening in your life. Might the conversation come back around to wedding things? Sure. But maybe, you’ll actually help prevent an outbreak of the Bridezilla by helping me (us) to remember that life is still happening elsewhere.

Sincerely,

Me, on behalf of brides-to-be

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